Let's Pause For a Moment

In the midst of our remodeling debris, both literally and figuratively, it's easy to get wrapped up in day-to-day construction minutia and forget what really matters.

So please indulge me in a little reflection. It was one year ago tomorrow that I missed work because of intense pain in my abdomen. By Sunday, even though the pain had subsided substantially, I knew that something was seriously wrong. Being a total cheapskate, I didn't want to go to the emergency room, so we headed to our neighborhood quick care. And that is when Health Saga 2012 began.

After an ambulance ride to the hospital, CT scan and ultrasound, I was told by an ER physician that I had ovarian cancer. This was confirmed by the gynecologist we saw the following Monday, at which time we were referred to an oncologist in The Big City.

After two months of thinking I had cancer, as we awaited surgery with the world's busiest oncologist, my prayers were answered when we found out I didn't have cancer but a Low Malignancy Potential -- a small chance of becoming malignant. But I had so much yanked out of me while under the knife, I don't think there's anything left to which the bad cells can attach.

Anyway, post-surgery I have tried to embrace life more fully and be more adventurous. First, I quit a job that wasn't feeding my passion. Next, I started working at LevelHead Jr's school. It fills my heart, if not my wallet.

And buying this house is also part of post-cancer-scare life. I've always wanted to renovate a house, so why not? If it's a great big money pit, I'll spend the rest of my days repaying Mr. Hubby both financially and emotionally. Lucky for me, I found a house in a neighborhood that's always been the Hubster's favorite, so it didn't take too much convincing. So it's a gamble I'm willing to take.

And despite the setbacks and unforeseen costs, I have been loving every minute of it. Yesterday I was in Lowe's trying to find range hood specs for the electrician while simultaneously taking a call from Tall Drink of Water -- I could not have been happier. I must have looked like a lunatic walking around the big box store with a smile on my face.

Mr. Hubby says my face lights up when I talk about the trials and tribulations of construction life. And it's true. I would love to find a way to do this for a living, but I know that's a stretch. So many factors come into play -- the economy, our local real estate market and our personal finances -- not to mention my total lack of experience.

But I'm trying to live in the moment (another benefit of the cancer scare). And at this minute, I'm pretty pleased with life, no matter what job I hold tomorrow.

Now back to our regular programming ...

It's All Smoke and Mirrors

Sorry for the lack of post yesterday. I spent the better part of the day with my new buddies, the electricians.

One of my buds, the apprentice helper, has the nickname ''Smoke''. I asked with fingers crossed if the nickname is due to his two-pack a day habit or his ability to cause fiery fumes at every job site. Lucky for me -- not so much for Smoke -- he's got a limited life expectancy due to his love of cigarettes. So of course, the lead electrician must hereby be deemed "Mirrors''.

On my morning drive to the house, my jaded self kept saying that something was going to go wrong and that they wouldn't complete the job as scheduled.  And my universe, which is currently ruled by misguided contractors, did not dissapoint.

It all started out well enough. Smoke and Mirrors are both cordial fellows and seemed ready for a day of wiring and circuits. They worked diligently for about an house until one of them mentioned the magic word that can halt an ongoing job faster than loose women on a Saturday night: ''break''. I guess 60 minutes of activity is rewarded with a quarter hour's rest and nicotine, according to union regs.

They eventually got back on task and were working efficiently when I had to leave for work. They confirmed that they would still be at the house when I stopped by post-kindergarteners. But when I opened the door, I didn't hear any Garth Brooks or Led Zeppelin, so I knew trouble was brewing. I figured S&M (their initials, gentle readers) were at lunch, so I scraped some wallpaper, tried to remove tile, sanded joint compoud, all my usual time killers. Still no Smoke and no Mirrors. I was about to leave when the front door opened, and Mirrors began apologizing for their tardiness. Not good, I thought. When's the last time a contractor apologized for being late?

Smoke then told me how their quick trip to McDonald's turned into a major ordeal when the truck wouldn't start after their Filet 'O Fish happy meals. So they had to have someone try to jump their truck (didn't work), then have it towed back to the shop.

At this point, I imagined their boss, shop owner Rug Man, turning into Mr. Crab from Sponge Bob. He must have seen dollar bills flying out the door at the thought of a qualified mechanic, so he called Smoke and Mirrors back to the shop to replace the truck starter. And as we all know, no one refuses Mr. Crab.

I didn't fight their departure too much since no other contractor was scheduled for today, plus we're paying by the job, not the hour. So S&M earning their mechanic badges wasn't really a deal-breaker for me.

And they were back today, which I'll tell you about tomorrow ... quite a cliffhanger, I know.

Here they are: Smoke and Mirrors (well, actually, Mirrors and Smoke).

One Thing Leads To Another ...

I think The Fixx wrote the song referenced above while working on a home renovation -- makes perfect sense. You start one innocent project, and the dominoes start falling.

This past weekend is another perfect example of our wanting to do one thing and being stymied because of something else. For regular readers, you may recall that Mr. Hubby and I planned to try tiling LevelHead Jr's shower. The HubMan deduced that maybe he had used too much thinset (mortar) the first time and would try less the second go-round. Great idea. But unfortunately, the result was that the tiling he had done last week stuck out farther than Saturday's attempt because of the difference in thinset quantity.

So we innocently said we'd remove every tile and start over. Another great idea. But now we can't get all the thinset off the cement board, so half of a shower wall is now a bumpy ride. And in a fit of frustration, Mr. Hubby put on a coat of RedGuard, the water sealant, on top of the leftover thinset. So now it looks like a volcano has oozed molten lava on the bottom of our wall.

OK, next idea -- he'll just remove that piece of cement board and put in a new one. Fabulous, except for the fact that he can't find the screws because of the RedGuard coloring.

Oy vie.

So today, after a good night's sleep -- with lots of dreams of beaches and daiquiris we'd be enjoying right now if we hadn't bought this house -- Mr. Hubby is off to the local hardware store before work for their advice on removing all the old thinset. And I'm going to call tile installers to see how expensive it would be to turn over the whole cotton-pickin' headache to the pros.

On an unrelated yet bummer note, we went to the remnant sale at the countertop fabricators. At first I was so excited because they had several pieces of the quartz that I have been eyeing on-line. But once the sales dude started looking at our kitchen layout, there just wasn't enough to put it together without having a million seams. Thwarted again. We did find a piece of granite for our laundry room folding area, so there you go. A brief bit of sunshine in an otherwise rainy weekend.

But we're now in a whole new week, and the electricians will be at the house tomorrow to do their rough-in. I'm sure they'll get all their work done quite efficiently without finding any problems whatsoever.

A disillusioned girl can dream, can't she??

Should We or Shouldn't We?

Mr. Hubby did a little more tiling in LevelHead Jr's bathroom yesterday. It's not looking so hot -- some not-so-small gaps between tiles, a few crooked. Please understand that I say this fully realizing that I could do no better, probably a lot worse.

So what do we do now? Mr. Hubby is removing what he installed, but do we try it again ourselves or hire a professional?? The whole point of this renovation is to do as much as possible ourselves, but it's also important to know your strengths and limitations. I dare anyone to teach financial analysis better than my award-winning better half. So does it really matter that tiling is not his forte'?

At one point, Mr. Hubby suggested finishing the whole shower and seeing if the grout covers up the imperfections. But that's a big IF and a chance this Lazy Perfectionist is not willing to take. What's a Lazy Perfectionist, you ask? It's a term coined by the Hubster that describes my need to have jobs done perfectly but my complete lack of motivation to do them myself.

The vexing part is that he tiled the kitchen backsplash in our current house, and it's fabulous -- can't imagine a pro doing it any better. So why is this shower so much more difficult?

We don't have the answer to that yet. I stopped by the library and got a book on tiling. I'm sure reading a few pages about installation will more than equal the years of experience a professional gets on the job everyday.

So maybe a compromise is in order. We'll try it again this weekend, and if it doesn't look any better, I'll have to call in the big tile guns.

I should warn you that projects where Mr. Hubby and I work closely together usually end up in shouting matches, so be prepared in my next post for a commentary on divorce lawyers.

On a happier note, we're planning to go to a local countertop shop that's having a weekend remnant sale -- hoping we can get a deal on quartz to help offset some of these unforeseen costs. Yeah, I hear ya, good luck with that ...

This and That

Not too much to report today. Went over to the house after school yesterday and saw that Tall Drink of Water and Polar Pop did indeed show up and have filled the big hole in the basement with 10 inches of rock-solid cement, or is it concrete? What's the difference? I guess I should know, being a permit-holding General Contractor and all, but I have no idea.

Is cement when it's wet and concrete when it's dry? Are the terms interchangeable? I guess it doesn't really matter at this point. The important thing is that all this construction product is now ready to support our house and keep it from imploding into a man-made sink hole.

They also dropped off the steel beams. Man, those things are heavier than my eyelids after a day of working with kindergartners who can't go outside for recess. I have NO idea how they got them moved into the garage; I'm just thankful that our contractor is not only tall, he's also incredibly strong. And as noted yesterday by one of my readers, "pretty easy on the eyes.''

They also cleared out drywall in the kitchen where I plan to put a shallow pantry cabinet. Definitely need to follow up on this. If they have to take down that wall, I've got a 27-inch wide, 92-inch high cupboard with no place to go. This homeless cabinet has to establish residence somewhere. Would it be weird having to get my Cheerios from behind the bathroom toilet? I guess the family member on the pot at the time might want to weigh in on this idea.

Still feeling pretty fatigued, so it will probably be just work and a little on-line shopping today. We need to start thinking floors. We want hardwood -- it's just a matter of which wood will be least susceptible to LevelHead Canine's nails, which seem to grow as quickly as bamboo. Maybe that's a sign as to what flooring we should buy ...

There's a Whole World Out There!

I know it's only been two days, but it sure was nice getting back to work this morning and enjoying all those sniffling kids again. Antibiotics are a wonderful thing!!! I don't take them very often, but when I do, I thank God for Dr. Alexander Fleming and his moldy petri dishes.

During my down time yesterday, I made a whiny call to Tall Drink of Water, our errant wall removal contractor. Never underestimate  the power of a woman on the verge of tears to get things done. He called me back a few minutes after our initial conversation to tell me he and Polar Pop would be at the house today to do some prep work in the basement.

This got me thinking: I have a friend who uses menstrual cramps as a sickness excuse with her male boss because she knows it will immediately shut him up. What man is going to follow up with questions: "Do they really hurt that bad? Can you rate the pain on a scale from one to ten? Do you have the kind that makes you nauseous or just the aching kind?'' Ain't gonna happen. He just takes her word for it and gets off the phone toot-quick.

I hate to let such a good idea go to waste, so I'm trying to figure out a way to use menstrual woes as a way to get TDW to do our work faster. Now, those of you who followed my cancer scare blog last summer know that these pains are impossible for me to have at this point, but HE doesn't know that. But I'm still not sure how to work them into the conversation with the intention of getting our walls down more quickly. I'll have to mull that one over. If I could see him in person, I might approach with a heating pad, bottle of Midol and some unprovoked yelling -- that would probably get him to agree to anything. But over the phone ... not so simple.

Since the electrician has a female assistant who might follow up with some unwelcome questions about my ''woman problems'', I chose the email route with her and have scheduled the rough-in for next Tuesday.

Tomorrow, if I keep feeling better, I hope to actually do a little work myself ...

Meet LHC

While in the second day of recovery from my sinus infection, I won't be going to the house and doing anything remotely productive. So I thought I'd tell you a little about the fourth member of our family, LevelHead Canine.

LHC is a Sharpei mix we adopted from our local animal shelter about four years ago. If I had to use one word to describe her, it would be OBSTINATE!! She does nothing we tell her to do; she's not really food-motivated, so we can't even bribe her. And she's what the animal shelter affectionately calls an "escape artist." Translation? She will dart out any door opening if it's at least an inch wide. She's like a mouse who can flatten herself to get about anywhere she wants -- which is usually out the door and roaming the neighborhood in search of rabbits and deer.

We thought having a fence in our current home's backyard would do the trick, but no, she can dig with the best of 'em and has had quite a few escapes from the LevelHead family ''prison'' (apparently that's what she thinks of us because she's always trying to break free). Mr. Hubby has gotten to the point of pouring cement around part of the fencing to keep her at bay.

But she always comes back to us. One time, LHC was gone about four hours, and we thought it was over -- she was either hit by a car or had joined a pack of wolves. But no, she showed up on our porch, dirty as jeep that's been off-roading for days.

Deer are her arch-enemy, and many of her escapes have been due to a fawn or buck that has taunted her one too many times. So what do we have in abundance at the new house? Venison, and lots of it. Even though this house is more in the city than our current home, I think the deer have established their own nature refuge on our little bit of property. They hang out in the backyard, sleep in the bushes in our little courtyard upfront and basically do anything they can to drive our dog to the brink of insanity.

And her barking from inside the house does nothing to deter them. They give her the classic ''deer in the headlights'' look and go on about their foraging.

So when she's at the new house, LHC will sit by the big window for hours, just waiting for a glimpse of her nemesis. And when she sees one, she goes absolutely berserk. Barking, whining, running around the house to look out every window -- I think she'll be taken away in a straight jacket before it's all over. But she'll have had one heck of a ride until then.
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Hope to return tomorrow with actual house renovation news.

Here are some pics of LHC on Deer Watch; it's like Baywatch without the bikinis ...